Gurus and so-called motivational experts teach that we are free to decide our future, to do whatever we want, to believe whatever we wish. We can be whatever we want to be. We can pursue personal goals and choose our path to happiness.
Viktor Frankl experienced life in several Nazi concentration camps through World War 2. He lost several members of his family, including his wife. He was deprived of liberty.
Viktor Frankl said we determine our happiness (meaning of life) via our freedom of will. We are free to think what we want, to feel what we believe.
Liberty is a condition or right to engage in actions as allowed or limited by the laws of wherever we happen to be. It is freedom limited by other people, that is, societies, governments, enterprises, private associations, etc. We can do only what the laws allow.
Freedom in the context of free will and what gurus & motivational experts talk about is about the unlimited space we have to decide our fates, to choose what we like, and to go to wherever we want to be.
What the gurus & motivational experts don’t say, however, is that freedom comes with a price.
Boundaries of countries, regulations, economics, culture, peer pressure, and our social & family ties attempt to corral that unlimited space. Some of these boundaries are real, some are all in our minds. But they’re there and we pay a price whenever we challenge them for the freedom we want. What we have within these boundaries are liberties, not freedom.
Freedom is not free. The more we want it, the more we’d have to pay for it, to work for it, to fight for it.
Sometimes it’s not just a good idea to fight for that freedom of unlimited space.
I’ve seen young families opt for the good life of travel and neglect their families. They cry at the funerals of their passed away relatives as they regret not being there when they were needed. Afterwards, they travel again and in their later years, they regret not saving enough time for retirement. Their children, meanwhile, follow the same footsteps of enjoying the good life and neglect their families.
As much as we are tempted to negatively judge people for choosing paths that seem wrong, we are in no position to do so. The people were and are free to decide what they wanted and they paid the price for it.
Freedom isn’t about enjoying unlimited space but is about gaining more control and influence.
Control depends on our values & principles. We steer our lives based on what we believe are important to us. And we put our efforts and resources to controlling our actions towards those values & principles.
The beauty of our values & principles is we can change them as we learn and experience. And in effect, we can change what we control.
Our degree of control depends on what we can influence. We should strive to be more influential to gain greater control. Influence is not power; it’s the ability to bring others to share your values & principles, and to lead yourself & others to common goals.
Influence is a paradox in that in order for us to sway others to our side, we need to listen and consider the opinions of those others. To sway, we should allow other people to sway us. Influence is a two-way street; we influence as we also are influenced.
Freedom is that unlimited space we wish to enjoy. Liberty, on the other hand, corrals us to a limited domain depending on where we are. We strive to gain and experience more of that unlimited space that lies beyond liberty. We pay a price for it when we do.
Our freedom, however, grows via how much we control and influence. Control is about maintaining our path towards our goals. Influence is about getting more control over those things that limit our freedom. We gain influence not by asserting our beliefs but by considering other people’s points of views and sharing ours.
[The Philippines celebrated its 125th Independence Day on June 12th, 2023].
Ellery's Essays 